The Dreaded Call…

As a parent of a school-aged child you are always in fear of the dreaded call…from someone at the school telling you that your kid has done something bad. I have been on the other end of the call a few times already and I always apologize and feel like a fool when I hang up. How can I not? Every kid is going to have bad days and Nate is just like other kids, but lately he has been having more bad days at school and it reflects poorly on me as his mother.

The call I got last week was that Nate refused to sit during circle time and he kept getting up. Now picture a room of 4-year olds with one that keeps getting up, running around and not listening. It distracts the other kids and annoys the hell out of the teacher. Lunch time comes around and he refuses to sit in his seat again. When he is told 3 times to sit down he clenches his fists, stamps his feet, starts to cry and yells at the teacher. Lovely right? I’m blushing just thinking about it.

This one day wouldn’t be a problem but this has become more of the norm since November. Nate has been having some emotional issues since we came back home after the hurricane. He refuses to sleep in his bed at night, is very emotional (crying or angry and yelling) and clingy with me especially. He almost wasn’t invited to his best friend’s birthday party this past weekend because he was crying too much at school and Jason didn’t want to be his friend anymore! I felt terrible when I heard that but I understood where the kid was coming from. No one wants to be friends with a cry baby.

I spoke to Nate’s teacher and we decided to start with a sticker chart at home for specific things he needed to work on. I found a site with super hero reward charts (so exciting!) and we were off to a great start. Every day Nate had 5 things to work on and if he got stickers for all 5 he could have a piece of candy after dinner. He loved getting stickers for getting dressed in the morning, being good at school, eating his lunch, going potty and wiping and washing hands and brushing teeth. Every week we switched it up a little depending on the previous week. Then the holidays came…

Every year for an entire month my whole life is a nightmare and this year was no different. All bets are off, there is no schedule, we eat whatever is convenient and I hope for the best. I realize now that Nate needs a schedule and I wasn’t doing him any favors by being off so much because he became even more clingy. Ugh. Back to square one.

Yesterday I had another dreaded call…with the special education department for Pre-K. I had to bite the bullet and schedule a time to go in and fill out the paperwork so I can have Nate evaluated. He doesn’t want to talk to me when he has a bad day, he won’t look you in the eye and he cries if he thinks you’ll be mad at him. I’m at a loss for how to make this better so I figured I may as well call in the professionals. God help me.

Can I get a little help?

In the healthcare industry customer service is HUGE. Unhappy patients mean low HCAP scores which mean lower reimbursement rates. Word of mouth is what makes hospitals their money because when you have a choice of which hospital to go to you are most definitely picking the one that you hear positive things about. Have you ever heard someone say, “I heard that hospital is awful so that’s where I’m having my surgery!”? Of course not and that is why there are people who teach customer service to employees of large businesses.

I happen to be someone who is not really a people person but I am also smart enough to know that my job is based on being friendly and accommodating with donors and I think I handle myself quite well.  I also know myself well enough that I got out of retail at the first job offer I had after college. I only worked retail seasonally while I was in college and I actually liked my job and my co-workers…but I HATED customers. I consider myself a good customer so I did not like people messing up the clothes and being rude. I preferred to work on the deliveries and clean the stock room but I was very accommodating when people needed help.

Which brings me to my point for the day…I really despise going into a store and not being able to get help. There should be someone working the floor at all times in case you need a size or you are looking for something specific and you can’t find it. In the age of texting and emails people are no longer looking to interact with real people. When I go to CVS or the grocery store I have the option of self checkout. Now don’t get me wrong I am loving self checkout because I hate lines and I usually only have a few things. Unfortunately there are times when I need some help and I can never get any.

For example, I usually pick up groceries before work because I drop Nate at school at 8am and I still have 20 minutes to kill on a normal day. When I get to Stop & Shop there is not one cashier available but there are 6 self checkouts. Normally this isn’t a problem because I only get a limited amount of groceries. If I have a day off however I will pick up a lot more groceries and that is when I want a REAL cashier to help with my groceries. Is that asking too much? I remember the days that you got a cashier and a bagger! The self checkout area is usually limited to a few bags and if I am getting a shitload of groceries it is just a pain so I prefer a conveyer belt and a live person.

CVS is a whole different story. The Southampton store added self checkout and they no longer have a person at the register. I don’t want to sound ageist but people over a certain age do not get the self checkout. If I run in to get something quick I do not want to be stuck behind the older person who has no idea how to scan a coupon or use their credit card. I honestly don’t think it should be a problem to have one cashier at a store. I’m all for technology but sometimes a personal touch is necessary.

P.S. I have been trying to upload a picture but it's not working...and it is stressing me out so you have to deal with the blurry one!

Mother of the Year

I was chatting with one of my friends from college this morning and she told me that her parents are staying with her. She was saying that she really needs a break and I wondered how long they were there. I let out an audible gasp when she said 3 weeks! I love my parents but as an adult I have no desire to live under the same roof. When I had to stay there last year after the hurricane for 9 days I was going crazy. When you live with someone for any short period of time it is like they are invading your space or vice versa.

My mother has been watching Nate since I had to go back to work when he was 11 weeks old. In the last 4 years he has become quite attached to his Grammie and she misses him when she has a day “off”. Nate sees it as a normal day and I see it as having to have my house clean at all times. My mother is having surgery next month and I am looking forward to not having a clean house. That may sound weird, but having floors that you can eat off of at all times is exhausting. When I come home from work I want to spend time with Nate and Love and not worry about doing the dishes and dusting. I want to put Nate to bed and relax in bed with a book or magazine. Spend an hour watching Revenge and not being stressed about folding the laundry. I also don’t want my weekends bogged down with chores while Nate plays and Love relaxes. I want to not feel stressed about running errands or visiting friends because it is cutting into the time I have left to clean and hopefully relax for an hour or so Sunday night.

I was so relieved when Tara said that her mother is obsessed with laundry (even doing it on Christmas!) and keeps rearranging her kitchen. My mother is obsessed with my dishes. She cannot stand anything in my sink but I normally do the dishes after dinner and anything after that sits in the sink until I am making dinner the next night. She insists on hand washing everything even though I have a dishwasher and it drives me nuts. She also puts things away and then I can’t find them because they are in the wrong drawer or cabinet. I rearranged my kitchen counters before the holidays and my mother told me she was so glad I did because you can see them from my living room and it was a mess. My counters are always clean but she didn’t like where I had things and now she thinks it’s much better. So do I, but I would never tell someone their counters are a mess…okay so I told her that hers are a disaster after she said that to me…but it’s true and she admitted it because she does have crap all over.

Tara and I agree that it’s nice to have help with the kids but instead of paying someone to watch them you pay the price by having your nosy parent watch them. I am not Suzie homemaker and I fully admit it. I also have no desire to be the perfect housekeeper or mother of the year. I have a full-time job that takes a lot out of me and come home to a second one. I’m doing the best I can and although I’m not perfect I think we do okay…and so does my family and that’s all that really matters.

ShopRite Can Can Sale

My Grandmother passed away January 15, 1999 and it is a day that I will never forget. It’s one of those days that I can remember small details that normally you wouldn’t remember a few hours after they happened and most certainly not 14 years later.

My Grandmother was a bit of a hoarder. Not a hoarder like you see on TLC or A&E, so I suppose she would be considered a classic pack rat. She had several rooms in her house that were chock full of items that she couldn’t bear to get rid of. She lived in a split-level ranch and my Mother’s old bedroom downstairs was where she kept her stockpile. Now that I think of it, maybe she was more like those crazy coupon ladies on TLC than a hoarder. If there was a sale on non-perishable items my Grandmother was there and she was loading up.

There was nothing my Grandmother loved more than the ShopRite Can Can sale. It was the closest supermarket to her house and she would buy her beloved tuna fish and soup as if the world was ending tomorrow. She had metal shelving like most people keep in their garages and it was filled with cans. I was always amazed by the amount of stuff that she had because my mother was not into stockpiling food like that and we had four mouths to feed and she only had one. Of course she cooked for her two dogs J.D. and Tasha like they were her children. I swear those dogs ate better than I do on most days.

On the day that she died I left work and rushed to the hospital but didn’t have a chance to see her before she passed. It was late when we left the hospital and we had to pick up her car. My Dad offered to go with my uncle to pick it up and that’s when I realized that my Grandmother died doing what she loved…her car was at ShopRite…and the Can Can sale was in full swing. We laughed when they returned to her house with the car and they opened the trunk. She had managed to get all of the groceries into the car before she got sick and an ambulance was called. My Grandmother was a tough lady and she died after stuffing her truck full of tuna fish, soup, vegetables and dog food. The Can Can sale began today and it made me smile…and I know that she is somewhere smiling too.

Sayonara 2012

It is officially 2013 and I am hoping that it is a better year than 2012. I have said that every January since 2010 so I don’t have high hopes, but one can dream. The end of 2012 was actually pretty good so I feel some momentum going into the new year that will bring along good vibes…if only it were that easy.

Putting away the Christmas decorations this year made me sad but not in the same way it normally does. I always feel like there’s so much build up to Christmas and then it just blows by with not enough time to spend with my family. This year we had more time with family but it still went too fast. I took Sunday to clean up the decorations early and get the house in order so I could relax on New Years Day. It was a good plan even though I would have loved to sit by the tree for a couple of extra nights before saying goodbye.

This year was special because Nate really understood Christmas and we had a lot of chats about different things that he is now starting to understand. It was the first year we discussed the Nativity and the birth of the baby Jesus. I even recorded the conversation on my phone because it was really cute. My mother has been trying to guilt me into taking him to church but I’m not quite ready for that but I still thought that he should know about the real meaning of Christmas. He gets the retail version of Christmas but I grew up with the Nativity and I think he should too even if it’s the Peanuts version for now anyway).

Christmas morning was a flurry of wrapping paper and super heroes before I even finished my coffee. I felt like screaming, “Do you know how many hours I spent wrapping all of those presents?” but I just sat back and took pictures. I was very impressed with how excited Nate was with each new toy and that his excitement also carried over to my presents. He ran over and helped me open them and made sure I liked each of them before heading back to his toys. He really is a sweet kid (I mean he is MY kid) and the look of joy on his face was the best. Christmas was special when he was a baby but now it is even more fun. From decorating the tree to opening presents the look of wonder on a kids face is something that you never get tired of. I will certainly miss it when he is a cranky teenager.

I’m starting the year off with plans to use one of my Christmas presents regularly. Love bought me a new camera since I stopped using my old one when I got the iPhone. I always complain about getting the pictures off of my phone so Love got me a nice camera that I cannot wait to use. In the last week I have already taken over 250 pictures and I’m looking forward to taking some pretty outdoor photos soon. I’m sure Nate will appreciate me taking photos of nature instead of having the camera in his face all the time.

 Nate and the Nativity

 Nate with his cousins opening presents

 Charlie loved all the wrapping paper

 Christmas Eve with Daddy

 Putting out the reindeer food

 Santa Came!

 Casual Nate :)

George Elf

I realized that I was going to post pictures from the adventures of our Elf on a Shelf and I never did. I curse the person who invented that fucking elf but it did help keep Nate in line so I should be thankful...but I'm not because it's a pain in the ass to move that God damned thing every night. Ask any parent who was dumb enough to buy one and they will agree.

George's first appearance of 2012 was tame

Love had him dangle from the kitchen ceiling fan

He took a ride in Nate's firetruck...

and one of his pirate ships

Dangling from my bedroom ceiling fan

Head first into the M&M's

Hangin' with Jessie and Woodys

Breakfast anyone?

Nate said he should play with my makeup...

I thought he should get drunk with Jessie and put on a tiara and makeup

 George Elf misses the Olympics

 Here's Georgey!

 Firing squad Elf style

 George misses Santa

 Stuck in the tree

 Dressed as Santa for company

 Continuing the Santa routine

His not so subtle way of telling Mickey to shut up

I think I may plan ahead next year and look for small props throughout the year that I can use...or I may just say he got lost on his way back from the North Pole.

Woo Hoo Weekend!

It has been one of those weeks that just drags on and on and gets worse by the day so I am REALLY looking forward to a (somewhat) relaxing weekend. Christmas shopping and wrapping are done with the exception of a few items and all I need to buy are 2 gift cards so I am thrilled.  More time to spend with the men in my life, even though I have been spending a lot of time with them lately…just not quality time.

Last Sunday I was cooking dinner (a miracle unto itself lately) and I got a splinter in my thumb. No biggie, I just grabbed the tweezers and got the sucker out. Monday morning I had to take Blue, our 10-year old beagle to the vet for dental surgery. His teeth have been horrible for way too long but I kept living in denial and was in fear of taking him to the vet. I finally broke down and took him 2 weeks ago. So they tell me his teeth need to be pulled and they will give me an estimate of what it will cost when we leave. They check his irritated skin which is why I brought him in and they prescribed and anti-inflammatory. I told them how he likes to pee in my house in 2 particular spots and they gave me an antibiotic and said it might be a UTI. I left $266 poorer with a follow up appointment for the following Friday. Friday he had 3 shots, they took urine, gave us a new medicine and we scheduled him for surgery on Monday.  I left $217 poorer and depressed just as the weekend began.

Monday morning I dropped off Nate and then Blue. I was nervous all day but he was fine and had 17 teeth pulled and I am now $517 poorer. I couldn’t believe it but he was a just little groggy and still has 25 left to work with. Remember that splinter from Sunday? By Tuesday morning I knew that I had missed a little bit and it had swelled up to a little smaller than a chocolate chip. I headed to the dermatologist and she numbed my thumb and came at me with a scalpel. I almost passed out so she laid me back and I closed my eyes. I didn’t change the bandage until the next day and was shocked to see the HOLE in my thumb! It makes me queasy every time I think about it.

While I was waiting to see the dermatologist Love called and told me that something exploded behind our house. Turns out it was a 21-year old at this tiny environmental company using a torch to cut apart a propane tank. Brilliant. Luckily there is an ambulance company a few houses away so they took the guy over to Stony Brook immediately. While I was on the phone with Love he also mentioned that Nate was running a fever. When I came home he was a mess on the couch. I took his temperature and it was 103.7 degrees. I gave him Motrin and we headed to my bed since he wasn’t hungry. He was sweaty and tossing and turning most of the night but by mid-morning he was better so I figured it was a virus. That night he spiked the fever again…and last night again. Luckily this morning he wanted to go to school and his temp was 98.6.

Now it’s time for the weekend!

P.S. I have been trying to be creative with that damn Elf on a Shelf this year so I will post some fun photos next week ;)

Thanksgiving…I Know I’m a Little Late

The month of November has flown by at record speed. First a hurricane, then Election Day, Veteran’s Day, Thanksgiving…schools we closed more than they were open. For Thanksgiving we continued our tradition of driving Upstate to my in-laws. Love gets to hunt and my mother-in-law gets to feed us for 3 straight days. I always eat like crap and gain 10 pounds and this year was no different.

What was different was driving from 12:30am to 4am to get there which I have vowed to never do again. I fell asleep at 11:10pm and Love woke me up at 11:50pm. I don’t work well on very little sleep so I was a cranky bitch the whole ride and I kept dozing and then startling myself awake in fear that Love was asleep. When we arrived at 4am Nate woke up and announced that he wasn’t tired anymore. Yay! Great start to the holiday!

Thanksgiving was the usual fried turkey and antipasto salad that I love and of course dessert is always a highlight. I had the most fun this year shooting BB guns with the kids in the backyard. I know that sounds very back woods of me but I was glad my 4-year old shot his first gun with his cousins. My mother was horrified but she doesn’t get how fun it is to shoot at things!

Black Friday is always spent at the mall in Kingston. We have the kid’s picture taken with Santa and then we do some shopping. At some point we hit the food court for lunch and then head to Target as our last stop. The great thing about the mall there is that there are hardly any people. Don’t get me wrong there are a lot of people at the mall but not nearly what you would find at a mall on Long Island. You have to be crazy to go to the malls here or at least have a death wish. Friday night we always have dinner at Angela’s an Italian restaurant close to their house. It’s all you can eat pasta night and for the first time ever my sister-in-law and I had adult beverages with dinner. I actually felt like a grown up! Until my son said my nephew’s pickle was a penis…

Saturday morning we drove home so we could have dinner with my parents and my brother and his family. It felt like the longest day ever and I just wanted to get home and take a nap but instead I quickly got us ready to get back in the car. Dinner and dessert made me so sleepy that I am surprised I made it home before falling asleep.

Sunday we took family photos, ran a few errands and got home at 3pm. I wanted a nap again so badly but instead I started vacuuming and moving furniture in my living room to make room for the Christmas tree. Nate was super excited and I like to put it up the weekend after Thanksgiving because it puts me in a better mood. I love watching TV in the dark with just the tree lit. It reminds me of being a kid and how much simpler life was (not that it felt that way).  I was so happy to finally sit down at 8pm and watch my shows. I like Sunday night to be mommy time because I can watch my shows in peace and drink some wine. It’s a wonderful thing!

Monday it was back to work…more on that at another time…

The Abominable Obama

Friday night Nate and I were at Toys "R" Us to get some Christmas shopping done. As we approached the store he spotted a claw machine with an Iron Man doll in it. He of course said he wanted to see it so on the way out we stopped by to take a look. I am very good at the claw machine and have won some pretty fun stuff in them but I was not getting Nate ANOTHER Iron Man. All of a sudden I spotted a stuffed Obama head with big ears. It was so funny and Nate asked why I was laughing so I replied, "Look at the stuffed Obama head doll." He looked at me and started laughing and said, "The Abominable head!" which made me laugh harder. I explained that it was not the Abominable but Obama, our President. He said, "Yeah, I know that." His standard response to everything lately.

Sunday I decided that we should wrap the kids presents together. I let Nate pick which paper each present got wrapped in and at one point he chose Rudolph paper and asked me to cut him a piece with the Abominable on it. I handed it to him and he said, "We saw him last night in the machine." I started laughing and again explained that we saw Obama the President and not the Abominable. This time he looked at me and said, "Oh yeah, he's white and fluffy right?" Far from it my boy, far from it lol!

Pilates Panic!

Last week life started to get back to normal for all of us. Nate was back at school, I was back at work and getting back to my routine. I was really looking forward to getting back to Pilates because after 2 weeks off I was feeling out of shape. I went to class alone on Tuesday and I found out that today is our instructors last day!

O

M

G

Panic set in as I realized that my beloved Pilates class was no more. My instructor is such a wonderful woman and she pushes us just enough but not too far. I have been feeling so much stronger after the last 3 months and now it might be over. I am hoping that there is a Christmas miracle and that next Tuesday someone will show up to teach the class. I don’t think I can make it through the next month of eating and drinking without Pilates.

I’m trying not to drive myself crazy thinking about it so I have a plan in place. I will take yoga on Mondays and Fridays and try to use my DVD at home to fill in. It won’t be the same but I need to keep doing something at this point. In January I am joining the gym at work so I can use the elliptical for an hour a day but I really had hoped to do that Mondays and Fridays and keep Pilates for Tuesdays and Thursdays and my massage on Wednesdays. For right now I will be thankful that I have Pilates today and a massage tomorrow. I’ll worry about all of this next week after the holiday.

Bad, Bad Mommy

There are so many days that go by where I wish I could have done more…okay almost every single day goes by in the blink of an eye and I never have time to do the things I want to do. As an adult I understand that I have to go to work in order to afford the basic necessities in life. The fact that I understand that logic in no way negates my feelings that I would love to spend more time with my child…well, sometimes.

Let me begin by saying that on a weekday basis I wish I had more time with Nate. We rush around in the morning trying to get out of the house and I always end of yelling at him for something. He is like a slug in the morning and I am on my own to get him out the door and into the car. When I arrive home after work he wants to be on top of me because he missed me all day. I miss him too, but sometimes I have to pee and that’s pretty hard to accomplish with a 4-year old strapped to your neck. The next 2 hours are usually a blur of preparing dinner, eating, arguing over dessert, bath time, getting into pajamas, picking out clothes for the next day and finally laying in my bed together to rest.

Weekends and days off are a whole different story in my house. Nate is usually up between 6:30am and 7:30am (if only he could do this on school days) and is yelling that he has to go potty and then he begins whining for food and a drink. I drag myself out of bed and head to the bathroom with him and then we make our way to the kitchen. I make him something and then crash on the couch hoping that he will leave me alone so I can get another half hour of sleep. This of course rarely happens so instead I try and keep him occupied and I pray that there will be time in the afternoon for a nap.

Basically what this all boils down to is a cranky mommy due to lack of sleep (if only I could fall asleep at 8pm like him I would be fine) and a child who wants all of my attention because daddy is still sleeping since he worked most of the night. We go back and forth about what he wants to do (he likes games but I hate all of the games that we have so I push for coloring or puzzles) and eventually we settle and enjoy each other for a little while. Eventually he starts to whine for food again and gets cranky when I don’t offer what he wants. He will then continue to be cranky and he will at some point yell at me and I will calmly tell him that we do not yell at mama which makes him yell louder and cry harder and I start to lose my shit. Bad. Bad. Mommy.

I hate that it happens but he drives me over the edge with his temper which he inherited from me of course. I don’t curse around him so I just always end up yelling, “I’m done!” and I walk away. He hates that I walk away but I’m not sure what else I can do. He does calm down after a little while when I do that so I figure it’s better than having a screaming match with a 4-year old. Time outs don’t work because he just gets up and runs and after 5 or so times I lose it. I keep telling him there will be consequences and I do take away toys or restrict TV. I feel like I am losing my mind sometimes but I keep telling myself I am not alone. There have to be other mothers experiencing the same thing. Right?

You Laughin' at Me?

The gas situation on Long Island is horrendous. Last week one of my co-workers suggested that four of us car pool. I already drive with Aimee so adding two other people made sense. After I drop Nate at school Aimee and I meet up at a local shopping center and we now head to Westhampton to meet up with the other two ladies. The car rides were filled with stories from the hurricane including my nine days living with my parents and 4-year old.

Marsha is a sweet sixty-something, married, mother of two daughters with a great sense of humor. My co-workers are all fun people and we are like a big family that teases each other about everything. You have to have a certain personality to work with us. Our jobs are all very stressful so we need to be able to laugh throughout the day or we might all be committed.

Marsha came into my office on Friday morning and very seriously told me that she had to tell me something, but that I couldn't laugh. At that moment I knew I would be laughing as soon as the words left her mouth. She went on to say that after a week in the car with me that she thinks that I should be a stand up comedian. Cue the crickets...and the laughter. After six years working together Marsha knows me very well but she has no clue that I have a fear of public speaking. Having a conversation with my friends is very easy for me but writing jokes and standing on a stage in front of strangers is frightening to me.

She yelled at me for laughing (which of course made me laugh more) and said that I have good stories and great delivery. She told me I also have a way with cursing (now THAT is something I can agree with!) and that I am genuinely funny and should consider it. She said I should check out local comedy clubs and perform at an open mic night because a lot of the comedians are bad. All I could think was, "I would be the bad comic!!!"

I obviously am very flattered by her comments and am glad that someone enjoys my stories. I thought about it all weekend and I still get a kick out of it. I know that people laugh when I tell stories which makes me happy but I honestly never thought of being a comedian. I love to watch comedy specials and funny shows and movies but never thought of myself on one. Look at me getting ahead of myself now...someone tells me I'm funny and I'm imagining myself with an HBO special! I will continue to think about it and maybe I'll even start writing some material. You never know where life will take you.

Sandy Sucks!

Last week Hurricane Sandy blew through New York and left a huge path of destruction. Please be warned that I am going to whine about my situation a little, but know that I am so grateful that no one I know was injured or killed, or lost their home. I feel terrible for all of the people who lost everything.

I had to work an event a few weeks ago so I decided to take my day off on Friday, October 26^th so we could go pumpkin picking since we were expecting a storm the next Monday.  At first it was just predicted that it would be rain, then it turned to a tropical storm and finally a hurricane. By Saturday my mother was calling and telling me to stay at her house on Sunday because the storm was going to be bad. She continued to plead with me Sunday even sending an email instead of calling. To which I called her and told her to stop since we spent 3 days at her house last summer for Hurricane Irene.

I watched the weather reports Sunday and realized that the storm would be bad so we prepared as best we could. Love gassed up all three cars and prepared his apocalyptic survival kit and I packed clothes for Nate and me while finishing laundry. Love wondered why I was packing clothes and I wondered why he was packing a flint and a folding saw. It was a hurricane coming, not the end of the world.

By Monday morning the news was getting worse about the storm and it looked as though we might be evacuated. I let Nate play on the computer while I cooked some food that we could still eat if we lost power for a day or two. Then I decided to catch up on my DVR in case we lost power and cable for a few days. At 12:30pm we found out that portions of our neighborhood were being evacuated and we fell into one by just 2 blocks. I called my mother and told her to expect us in an hour. We finished packing enough clothes and toys for 2 days and headed to my parent’s house.

The hurricane was bad but it wasn’t terrible in my parent’s neighborhood. There were downed trees and telephone poles and sections of fence knocked over but there was no flooding and they never lost power. My neighborhood did not fare so well. Love and my father went to check on the house Tuesday morning. We had a tree from our neighbor’s yard fall across the street and it took down his power lines with it and was resting on our power lines. Our cable was also disconnected from our house and we had one tree split in half.  Our whole block was huge trees snapped in half and down across the street. It was a huge mess and of course we had no power.

I’m not going to go into detail about the whole week because it was a complete blur to be honest and not much went on. I stayed home from work all week since Nate didn’t have school so we took him shopping to get out of the house some days, we trick or treated with our friends and their kids, Thursday he was sick so we took him to the doctor (ear infection), Saturday we had a birthday party to go to, and Monday Nate went back to school and I went back to work. We FINALLY got power back last night so I stopped by the house after work to turn on the burner and vote before going to my parent’s for one final night. It was a very long 9 days at their house and I really wanted to go home but we had to eat dinner and then I had to pack all of our stuff so it made more sense to just sleep there one more night. I am very lucky that my parent’s are so close and so willing to let us stay with them. It’s not the ideal situation for anyone but I can’t complain because there are so many people who are really suffering. I am just happy to be going home tonight to my warm house to sleep in my bed!

Wedding Bells

One of my friends from high school was married a few weeks ago and it reminded me of when I got married…10 long years ago. It seems like a lifetime has passed since then. I was so young (only 25) and life was so different for Love and I back then. We were carefree and not tied down to anything. We went on lots of road trips and spent lots of time together. Lately we don’t see each other as much because of our work schedules and when we do have time together Nate is usually demanding all of our attention (No adult conversations! Listen to ME!!!). It’s tough, but it is also one of the reasons I am glad we were married so young.

Did I ever imagine I would meet my husband while in junior high and that we would go from friends to much more when I was only 20? Of course not! I actually thought Love was a little annoying when he was just my brother’s friend (true story!). Then one day that all changed and 6 months later I was in love (okay maybe sooner but it was a long time ago). We had a long distance relationship at first because I was away at school but he worked about a half hour away so he would visit often. I soon realized that I would probably marry him one day and that made me very happy. His proposal was sweet and I am proud to wear an engagement ring with diamonds from one of his grandfather’s rings that was passed on to him.

Our wedding day was wonderful and I will never forget how much fun we had with our family and friends surrounding us. It was a perfect June day (although a little hot for those in tuxes) and pretty much everything went according to plan. We had a few minor glitches (the photographer was a half hour late, my great-aunt fell down the church steps and a centerpiece started a brief fire) but all in all it was a perfect day to get married.

Looking back I wouldn’t change a thing about that time in our lives. We lived carefree in an apartment for 4 years before buying a house, waited almost a year to get a dog and it was another year before we were pregnant. Those 6 years, although rough at times, were some of the best of my life. Having only each other to worry about was nice and if we had known what was ahead of us once we became parents, I think we would have enjoyed it even more. Nate is my world and I wouldn’t trade him for anything but sometimes I dream of a simpler time in my life…I’m pretty sure most moms do.

 Look at how young and skinny I was!!!

 This has always been one of my favorite photos from the day

I look like a mob wife in this one lol!

Here comes Santa Claus…ALREADY?!?!?

I have been consumed lately with the stress of paying bills and playing catch up so I can start Christmas shopping. Am I crazy? Yup, I kind of feel that way because Halloween is still a week away and I have already started gearing up for the biggest holiday of the year. We got paid last week and I had to attend a baby shower so I decided that while I was already scheduled to be out of the house and there was some money in the bank that I should at least begin the chore of toy shopping. I headed to Toys R Us armed with my shopping list and in record time I dropped $220. The crazy part is I was excited at how much stuff I left the store with! Not to mention that my haul included 6 bags of Halloween candy.

What does one spend $220 on you ask? One birthday present, 4 toys for my baby nephew (how fun is it to shop for baby toys?), one big Spiderman, one big Batman, 2 Imaginex Batman cars with figures, one Team Umizoomi Counting Car, one Bot with Team Umizoomi Car, one big book of Superhero Squad stories…I feel like I’m forgetting something…

I am just glad to have begun the long task of shopping for gifts. I used to enjoy Christmas shopping because I had the time to begin early and finish before Thanksgiving. Now I feel like I am rushing until the very last minute and that I am going to forget someone. Luckily I am usually organized and make lists for everything. This year we are on a tight budget so I am looking for bargains wherever I can get them. I am planning on cutting back on Nate and only hitting Toys R Us when I have coupons. Last year money was tight and Love and I decided that we would not buy each other any presents. In the end we saved money, but it was so depressing. This year I prefer to cut back so we can enjoy opening presents with Nate Christmas morning. Isn’t that what the holidays are about anyway? Okay, it’s not about opening presents but it’s still fun!

TRX is the Devil

Anyone who knows me well understands my lack of enthusiasm for exercise. I’m not necessarily a lazy person because I can clean my house or my yard for hours and hours but I am very resistant to exercise. I have always been this way except for a few years where I went to the gym everyday with my friends (mind you I was 22-years old when that started). For some reason 2012 has been the year of exercise for me. I’m not sure if it’s the fact that I am 35 and realizing that it only gets harder with age or that I need to lose 50 pounds. Probably a little of both.

I have been taking Pilates twice a week for 6 weeks now and I actually enjoy it and look forward to it. I’ve even thrown in yoga here and there when I can on a Monday or Friday. Having my pain management doctor tell me to take the classes combined with the fact that they are free at my job keeps me coming back. I take pilates with 2 women in my office (22 and 55-years old) and one day someone in the class mentioned TRX and how great it is. It is offered in another location and we were curious so we asked about it. I wish I had never done that.

Turns out TRX is suspension training and each person in the class does it at their level. I decided to accept the free pass to try out the class. I dreaded going but the class was filled with people twice my age and the instructor (Oscar) was fabulous! I was honestly afraid the damn strap was going to rip the hook out of the ceiling with all of my weight straining against it but I did my best to forget about it. I will admit that the class was fun but it was also exhausting and I knew I would be in pain for days after. Ding ding ding! You are correct! Three days later and I am in a lot of pain. Clearly it is an excellent workout. My upper back, upper arms and the backs of my legs are killing me. I worked out muscles I didn’t even know I had. I have pilates today and I hope I can make it through. I’m thinking the stretching will be good for me. Please let the stretching be good for me.

Consequences

I have uttered that word so many times in the last 24 hours that I have lost count. I am running on empty lately between no sleep, a HORRIBLE diet and not enough water and I am quickly losing my patience. Being alone at night with Nate is challenging and he tests me constantly. There is no consistency with his discipline and it is showing. Last night I had enough and I started being the mean mommy…at least that’s the way Nate sees it.

Dinner has been a struggle and Nate seems to think that eating half of his dinner before declaring that he is full is a guarantee that he will have room for a snack. The problem is that he says he is full and before he has even left the table he is asking for a snack. Last night I told him he needed to eat more before getting a snack and he was okay with it. While I was doing the dishes he got down from the table and I asked him to go wash his hands so we could get him into pajamas. Suddenly he had a meltdown which included him smacking me in the butt. I don’t do well with tantrums at all but hitting is never acceptable behavior. I turned off the TV and told him that it was time for pajamas and bed (mind you it was only 6pm). He continued to yell and cry and even pushed my dishwasher rack in while I was loading it. I let him continue yelling about how he NEEDED to watch his show and for the first time in a long time I told him that he needed to learn that there were consequences to being naughty.

I always try to make the distinction between him BEING naughty and ACTING naughty. I don’t want to crush his self esteem and having him pleading with me that he is sorry and he loves me, makes my heart break. Last year my mother picked him up at daycare and he was sitting in the corner crying saying, “I’m a bad boy” over and over. It made her cry. I always convey to him that I love him to but I do not like when he acts a certain way or does certain things. He eventually calmed down enough to wash his hands, put on pajamas and come snuggle in my bed. Was it a perfect night? Of course not, but it could have been worse and maybe tonight he will be better behaved because he will realize that there are consequences.