It’s one of my favorite songs, one that never gets old no matter how many times I hear it. The Cure was a big part of my life for a while and it reminds me of a simpler time in my life. I’m referencing it today because I would love a current picture of myself that is flattering but I cannot seem to make it happen (technically it should be Pictures of Me but that’s not a song I’m familiar with so lets just go with it). When I look in the mirror my perception of myself is finally changing and I am happy. So I grab my iPhone, almost on a daily basis, and try and recreate that goodness in a photo…and I fail every time. I would love to say that it is just my stupid phone, but I have taken some amazing photos with it so it must be me. Mayhaps it’s the angle since I’m trying to take a self portrait. I always end up with at least 2 chins (sometimes the dreaded 3) and after 5 minutes I give up. There has to be a better way.
If you look through my pictures there are hardly any of me because I am usually behind the camera, which I think is true for most moms. I really enjoy looking at and taking photos but when it’s pictures of me I shudder. I have very few photos that I actually like and most of them are when I was skinny of course. Choosing my profile picture for Facebook was torture. In January I had the “new year, new me” attitude and since I cut my hair I have been trying to take a picture that I love and I am still trying. Ugh, thinking back on all the horrible pictures makes me sick. Why do I do this to myself? Who am I kidding? I will continue to take pictures and delete all of the bad ones and maybe one day soon I will have a new profile picture that I am finally happy with.
I wanted to share some really bad photos of me at my heaviest. These pictures keep me on track and I wouldn’t be 21 pounds lighter today without them. Unfortunately I was at my heaviest when my brother got married so there are plenty of bad pictures of me hanging around. I wish I had been disciplined enough back then but I can’t dwell on the past so here they are…
Me and my skinny sister-in-law at the rehearsal...my son was 2 at the time
After the wedding...OMG this is why I do not own anything strapless...my legs look good :)
There are no words to describe how horrified I am by this one
That's me in the middle...circa 2002...I was blonde and skinny
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